Tossin and Turnin

Last night I laid awake tossing and turning, for whatever reason my head was spinning, my mind would not shut off and the world around me seemed oppressively hot. The irony of it all was it was all in my head. The bed was perfectly comfortable with a light feathery down comforter, soft pillows, and cool to the touch. Air conditioning was on making the room feel a perfect and breezy 75 degrees.  Then I got to thinking of how much of reality is based on what goes on inside our head.

is it the little hamster the runs our minds?

or maybe its like this guys mind....

It's most likely a little bit of both what goes through our heads on a daily basis is a startling amount of thoughts, processes, and data coming from our senses.  Just take a moment and think, quiet out outside directions and think about how much goes on in the mind of yours. Hopefully there is a lot going on inside, a lot of thoughts, emotions, and feelings jumbled into what I like to think of as a highway of constant information and thought processes. Its up to you to decide what you process what you perceive and what you do with al this information.

Thinking about this got me thinking about how subjective our perception of the world is. Really it is our own reality, each and every individual holds the ability to view the world in their own way.  You can see this in the faces of depression-era survivors,  holocaust survivors, who despite their tortured pasts seemingly live happier and more robust lives then the majority of us. It's all in our mindset, it's all in the way we see things. I don't know how many times countless friends and family have told me that its the way I perceive things that changes the way I feel and act. So all those moments of fighting, bickering, and hurt often come from our mind simply ACCEPTING that we should be sad angry and hurt.

Think about it like this, beyond the time-tested adages of looking at the glass half full and there are always to sides to a coin, think about how cultures perceive death. If you look closely at Western Culture one can see the prevalent nature of grieving death. The classic all black and somber funeral, with quiet eulogies, a wooden casket, and a quiet dreary day. On the other hand look at how other cultures also treat death. Dia de Los Muertos is one of the largest celebrations in Mexico every year. In much of Asia one of the biggest days to get together with family is what is known as Burial Cleaning Day. It is a day where the entire family including aunts, uncles, brothers, sisters, and cousins all make it out to the family burial site and prepare food and blessings  for the loved ones. In this way we often celebrate the life of the ones we lose in a way that helps ease the pain of death and suffering. 

It is in the mindset of positivity and happiness that we must go about our days. It's not easy when obligation, pressures, and stresses at home pile up but I really do believe the most important thing in life is happiness. The pursuit of it, the maintaining of it, and the loss of it. Life is beautiful when you can see it like that. Life is worthwhile when happiness brings love and people into your life. 

So in a way it's weird to say but even though I'm barely old enough to have any sway or authority on the subject matter of "the meaning of life", I think I've found mine. The pursuit of happiness whether its through a career, a hobby, family, whatever. When we're happy money doesn't matter, material things are worthless, and the moments are the only things needed.

-Til Another Day

-Jonathan 

Weekend Recovery: Thoughts on life, movies, shows, and people

So I'm Back to work again.... 

It has been a wonderful three day weekend having had Friday off. Currently I have been sitting at my desk for about 4 hours with little or nothing to do. I've done some catching up on reading This I Believe which happens to be the summer reading book for Tufts. Apparently according to the letter I received from Tufts its a gift from the TISCH College of Citizenship & Public Service. If people aren't familiar with Tufts University (where I am heading in the fall, actually scratch that in less then a month I'll expand upon my thoughts about that a little later) the TISCH College is a very active part of the student body where leadership and service to the community abroad is heavily emphasized. The majority of students participate one way or another through the TISCH school to give back to the community or to help spread citizenship and a cohesive community.  This book This I Believe is based on a NPR series that asks individuals famous and non-famous to write a short 500 word essay on what they believe, they're core values, and who they are. After reading through a host of essays this morning a few stood out. Albert Einstein's belief in science as a way to understanding the Universe. A story from Isabel Allende speaking about the grief of her losing her daughter. All these stories brought to light the deepest core values of each individual. It was like looking through a window into someones soul. The essays are moving and thought provoking. 

So a quick recap of my weekend involved lots of sleeping, more yoga, LOTS OF SUSHI , good food, and good times with friends. Let's see if I can find some picture for ya. (I've decided to just post a bunch of pictures from summer)

Cool Finds

Griffith Observatory

Edamame so good

Beautiful Sunsets

Dodger

Adorable Grandmas You Wanna Hug

That Cute Girl Next to Ya

And Her Friends

I find that pictures speak more than words. It's universally true, if you think about it a picture is a combination of senses of light, color, emotions, memories put together to recreate or at the very least capture that moment in time. It's kind of cool to meld together writing and photography to narrate one's life. I've come to realize that this blog is my way of remembering what I do and who I am. Perhaps if I keep this up long enough it will be a way for me to remember the past as clear as it was back then.

So some MORE  thoughts about this past weekend. I watched a lot of tv and some movies. First off I FINALLY finished the season finale of 24. I thought it was a very fitting and proper ending to a pretty decent show. 24 has been action packed and unpredictable from the start, Kiefer Sutherland has done a wonderful job through and through as Jack Bauer. 

More recently I managed to set up my Wii (which I haven't had for along time) to stream some Netflix shows and videos straight onto my TV. To say the least I am EXTREMELY  to veg out on my sofa through the rest of my summer and all subsequent holidays at home. Have I ever told anyone that I am secretly in love with being an introvert. I can spend all day sitting in front of my TV doing nothing and feel like I've had a productive day.

Regardless my last few thoughts for the day come from the soon to be blockbuster movie of the summer INCEPTION  was absolutely mind bending ( actually it literally mind-fucked you) go to the link to learn more about the movie if you don't know already. I just have to say I have grown to respect Christopher Nolan even more as a director now after already witnessing slivers of genius in the Dark Knight and Memento. Behind the characters Leonardo DiCaprio (Titanic), Ellen Page (Juno), and Joseph Gordon-Levitt (500 days of Summer) the movie twists and challenges your mind to grasp the reality of multi-layered dream world. You not only get the action packed thriller of Dark Knight in this movie but also the complexity and introspection of Memento in the interplay of dialogue and development of Cobbs (Dicaprio) and Ariadne (Page). Inception is not just your usual summer blockbuster, it makes you think, it makes you ponder, and most importantly it makes itself memorable with its perfect blend of CG effects, story telling, emotions, and action. Inception is a must see movie of this summer. 

Last thought of the day.... heading to college. Over the weekend I was talking to Catherine  and the topic of going off to college came around. It made me realize that I have just over a month left here in La Canada before I jump head first into murky waters of college. I have no idea what I am doing. I REPEAT I HAVE NO FUCKING CLUE as to what I am going to do. Does this bother me? A little. Should it scare me? Yes. Do i acknowledge it. NO. That's kind of how I've approached this idea of college. Let it come to me and see where it takes me. Putting expectations and eagerly dreaming up what I want to do I think at times is overkill. I don't think anyone can really go into college saying for a 100% sure they know what they want to do, who they want to be. I think college is the perfect time to LOSE YOURSELF (think of Eminem) before ya WRECK YOURSELF but really its finally MY time to do what I want. To wake up in the morning or not, to party hard on the weekends or not, to make friends, to eat alone, to do anything. I see college as an exciting new frontier in my life, one that will only happen once. I don't plan on wasting a minute of it all, but I also don't plan on putting any expectation on myself. So that way in about four years I can look back and say, wow, I did something! 

Til Another Time Another Place.

-Johnny 

Bikram and the funnny things in life...

So I'm sitting here thinking about what to blog for the day, I've come to realize working full-time all summer provides me a lot of desk time to be on my computer; so I figure why not utilize it to post on my blog more often.  I've been sitting here for about a half hour trying to think of what to say....

But this incessant soreness in my back keeps bothering. Its a good kind of soreness, the kind you get when you WORKOUT to a point where it is a good soreness. But it made me think of how far I've come from being at my peak fitness and shape less than six months to go to where I am now. Now don't get me wrong I am not complaining about being out of shape and being lethargic I still go running and workout 4-5 times a week. It just so happens running Cross Country and Track for the last 4 years of high school my definition of peak fitness is not getting on a treadmill 5 times a day for 30 minutes. Its more like two a day workouts, hour to two hour long runs, weightlifting, cross training in the pool, and of course ab exercises. Thinking about it NOW I realize how much I miss the daily routine, the teammates, and the overall flow of how my day went. I really had my work cut out for me, cross country was like the battery that kept my metronome going at a steady rate. Anytime I was in season I got lots of sleep, studied hard, was caught up on homework, and was happy. Nowadays working out has sort of become a chore. So the solution to it all....

Is still in progress. I can't seem to feel productive enough only running 4-5 days a week without any goals ahead of me.

So I' have been trying some new things, namely Bikram Yoga. A little bit about Bikram Yoga (after the jump), essentially Bikram Yoga is done in 105 degree heat rooms where the lead instructor puts you through 26 different poses over an hour and half sessions.  I'm going to have to say doing Bikram Yoga yesterday was hands down one of the HARDEST workouts I have ever done. 

The way the poses demand your body to be put in positions it is HIGHLY unwilling to be placed in, as well as the incessant heat, and non-stop continued movement through all of the poses made me want to quit after the first half hour. And to everyone out there that laughs at the notion of Yoga, try Bikram before you dismiss it off. I thought that same exact thing before actually trying it out. It KICKs your butt, makes you wanna curl up into a ball a give up, but by the end you feel so good. Its like a euphoria of the body where every part of your body is relaxed and in a perfect state of equilibrium.

My recommendation TRY it before you DISMISS it. It's gonna hurt, it's gonna kick your butt,  but it will make you realize how much your body can take. 

I think I've found my solution to my lackadaisical approach to keeping in shape and feeling good about it. A weekly combination of running, cycling, swimming, and yoga to help relax my body. 

So I'm posting some images in honor of Le Tour De France 2010

(It's sad to see Armstrong go but alas its his time)

I do feel so beaten up and sore today probably from not being used to ever bending my back in ways i thought was impossible. 

Til Another Day

Johnny Wu

Intellectual Prose on Blogging and Life....

            It's funny how going days without blogging you get this itch, this burning need to write something, to say something out  LOUD to shout out loud about whatever weird things pass through your mind. This morning while I'm diligently sitting at work musing about the meaning of life, the origins of space, and such mundane things in life I slowly realize how much incessant internal dialogue I have with myself. If I even said half of what was coming out of my over inflated HEAD I'd talk my poor friends and family to death. 

              So I met some new friends in the blogosphere today, okay I didn't really meet them here we all went to school together but its kinda cool...Rage Paige, Jacob, Cece, Catherine. So I'm gonna blog about blogs! They know what their doing, speakin their minds, they do whatever the (excuse my language) fuck they want, and most importantly they express what their about. Whether its the music they love, the people the love to hate, the weird things they think up on the spot, they're constantly thinking. You see that's what I think blogging is about, a public forum for your diary. Just without the little posts about what guy you have a stupid crush on and how embarrassing it was to pee your pants back in 4th Grade....  anyway this whole blogging thing is kinda cool, I can say what I want be whoever I want, for all you know I could be a secret super hero. 

Anyway back to the thoughts trapped inside my head. I've recently started running again it's what you might call an obsession for me. The days and weeks that I miss out on running are some of the most stress filled and depressing days of my life. For whatever psychological and/or mystical reason, running is my therapy. A chance to get away from the MASSES and the obligations in life. When my feet head out the door with nothing on and the warm pavement underneath met I am free. I can hate myself, love myself, and judge myself all at the same time. There are no such things as  rules and expectations when I'm running, I am liberated and free. Above the cloud of pressure, obligations, and judgment I am free to move about the cabin, figuratively speaking. Running is my way of life, like a metronome that keeps me on beat. That lets me get away from the daily rush of life. That lets me be ME.

So I have a multitude of things in my life that I love. Most importantly la familia, los amigos, and food. But passing by these mundane loves of my life. If you were to peel away the flower petals of a rose and get to the center of it all you find what I really love...

Running

People

 

Pottery

Photography

 

It's funny that in a few words and a few pictures you can sum up a large part of who I am, yet these words and the pictures don't even begin to explain who I am. Why I am so odd, so at lost, so happy, and so in love with life. I've come to realize life is a series of contradictions. 

Seemingly perfect peace in the world contrasted with genocides and death. 

Seemingly perfect marriages contrasted with broken homes. 

Perfect rainy days and hurricanes

Perfect lives suddenly unraveled

One thing I can attest to, is that life can never be predictable, it throws the hardest curve balls, it sweeps you off your feet when you least expect it, and its takes everything away when you need it the most. But isn't that the Beauty in it? THe collection of hardships, relationships, memories, and life lessons that sum up who we are. Without the suffering without the challenges life would not be. Our memories our experiences truly define who we are. Life is good, life is amazing, life is

LOVE

That's all I have for now. My brains has thoroughly expelled of all tangible thoughts and coherent ideas.  I am at a impasse, my mind overworked. Maybe this will get you thinking about your own life, who knows, blogging kinda cool you get to share your thoughts with the world and hope that someone else can relate to it all.

Til Another Time,

Johnny Wu

Sidebar: 

Last night my neighbor gave me these amazing seats at the Hollywood Bowl to listen to Le Passions played by the (LA Philharmonic)  Catherine and I got superseats smack dab in the middle. Unfortunanetly I forgot to bring my memory card, but its turned out to be a perfect night, sitting there holding Catherine in my arms. It was a night filled with Debussy and Ravel and Saint Saens (my favorite of the three involving a beautiful violin solo throughout)

Sitting there lost in the music, with a beautiful girl  by my side I had time to appreciate the gifted life I live. In beautiful sunny Southern California, in the enclaves of La Canada, with amazing friends and family, and a perfect opportunity to live a cherished life. 

I am thankful and am at peace.

Working @ JPL

So a little update since my last few posts, I've come back to reality. Punta Mita was absolutely an amazing vacation, one that will be up there as some of the best memories I've ever had. Coming Back to La Canada our first stop on the way home was to none other than In-n-Out chomping down on a double double, fries, and  a cup of Dr. Pepper.

 Anyway Monday was the my first day @ JPL, to be honest I still have no idea how well I will do in my summer internship. I'm working under the optics lab @ JPL and am currently working on some imaging hardware and technology where I'm supposed to be checking the testing data for inconsistencies.


I'm working the 9/80 schedule at JPL therefore my day starts around 7:30 am to 5:00 pm, can I just say I suddenly have a greater appreciation for anyone who holds a 9 to 5 job. Working is TIRING. Who knew.


Anyway thats all for this post. Its the memorial day weekend I get five days off!.... here we go rage time.

'Til another time

-Johnny Wu

Day 5: Snorkelroo and Such

By far Saturday was the most amazing day here yet. The plan for the day was go snorkeling and then come back and have a relaxing day before our final dinner here.

As a preface, I was absolutely fearful of snorkeling ever since I went back in 4th grade when I went to Hawaii and had to snorkel in TWO FEET of water. Go figure. Regardless we headed out from Punta Mita on a small boat and headed to the Murrieta Islands for some of the most amazing views of sea life I have ever seen. We went snorkeling with our really chill guide Gustavo who encouraged us to dive deep down, really learn about the animals on the island. We learned about the Blue Boobed and Footed Bird (with understandably blue feet) and the Dragon Bird that can stay in the air for over two weeks if needed.

Regardless I wasn't able to capture any photos of this experience on my non waterproof camera. But to say the least snorkeling on these islands was on par if not better than snorkeling in Hawaii. It was pristene and amazing.

After coming back in the afternoon once again in another hazy of sleepiness, I vividly remember quietly sobbing while watching US play Ghana and lose in extra time. I wept myself to bed and woke up a few hours before dinner.

Dinner was fantastic. Sashimi. Pickled Fish. White Wine. Potato Wedges. Grilled Red Snapper Fish. Grilled Vegetables. And a slideshow top it off.  Under the influence of delicious wine we reminisced about classic Disney channel shows and movies.

After dinner the group collectively had a division of what they wanted to do with their last night. The girls were in for a quiet night. and the guys.... well guys night, involving lucha libre masks, tight boxers, and beer pong with forties. One of the highlights of the week. Also did you know that in Mexico E tv allows full frontal nudity

Til another day

-Johnny

Day 4: Tanning Lines and Chocolate Tasting

Realizing that your vacation is almost halfway is a sobering fact. You want the time lost, time passed, and the times gone.

I'm going to freestyle a poem while slowly slipping into a lulling daze drinking wine:

A Lifetime

Where the lazy river flows only some know

Where the natives go no one can know

Where the tourists tour everyone knows

Its those hidden gems in the world that we cherish

Its those secret places that capture our imaginations

Its those childhood memories that we relish

Its those secret moments that demand our adorations

Family, friends, strangers, and soul mates

Are the ones that make our hearts sing

Are the ones that make our hearts sting

Are the ones that define you 

Growing up you want to be an astronaut
Growing up the skies the limit
Sobering up its about having a steady job
Sobering up its about realizing your limits

High school is that social incubator for real life
College and beyond life gets too real
Time to get real
Time to get ready for it all

A lifetime is a summation of memories
A lifetime is about the relationships built
A lifetime is about the meaningful things done
A lifetime is a fleeting chance, yet such a beautiful chance to LIVE

Back to my post about the day 4.

I managed to drag my lazy body up around 9 to head out to explore and run along the local running paths. It was a gorgeous run, but the suffocating heat and oppression of the humidity sent me scrabbling back to the gym to finish working out in a fully air conditioned paradise.

After a good morning involving working out (which always puts me in a good mood) and finally everyone managed to wake up we headed down to the infinity pool for smoothies, mojitos, and margaritas. I swear that Mexico has made me way too tan, Jonathan calls me black and to be honest I've gotten my first tan line in ages

The lazy river here is one of the hidden gems within the four seasons. It wraps around a private building complex, where the river is indeed lazy and the float tubes make it even easier. However my favorite part of the day had to be chocolate tasting. Who knew there was so much history and mystique behind chocolate.

The night was pretty fun with a good family meal and flip cup and some mixed drinks to end the night.

'Til Tomorrow,

-Johnny